Seven Day Countdown...

In just seven days I will run my first full marathon in almost two years, and my first race at all in eighteen months: The Philadelphia Marathon....and I'm very nervous.  I am probably just as nervous as I was before my first race or marathon ever, and I'm not quite sure why.

Maybe I'm nervous because I'm feeling less prepared for this race than I was hoping to be.  I had been hoping to get a new Personal Record, and get some solid long runs in this summer and fall.  But, Fallon and I have been sick on and off for most of October, and work has been very demanding since July, so I haven't trained as much as I would have liked...certainly not as much as I thought I would have in June when I registered for the race.  I have run marathons severely under-prepared before, but the fact that I have not run one in so long has decreased my confidence.  

Maybe I'm nervous because I haven't cross-trained the way I have in the past.  Before almost all my previous races, I have taken spin classes and weight trained to supplement running to prevent injuries. But, I haven't been able to take any classes this time around, and my weight training has been sporadic at best. At least it has occurred, but it hasn't been consistent and so my muscles haven't dramatically improved in strength and definition.

I am a little nervous about the logistics of the trip. I'm taking Fallon and two friends up to Philadelphia with me. And my dad is coming down from Boston to watch Fallon. The entire entourage does have me uncertain. I do not know how the dynamics will be.  As dear and generous as my two friends, Bob and Elizabeth, are, it's difficult for two people without children to understand exactly how slow and hectic a two and a half year old can make things.  My girlfriend Elizabeth told me she was planning on wearing a specific shirt that Fallon will like.  That's adorable. But it only concerns me more because my particular two-year-old has a knack for making those who try hard feel completely inadequate.  She has cut my mom, brother, and sister to the quick at various times.
I hope she doesn't hurt anyone's feelings....or have a meltdown in the middle of the expo...something I can absolutely see happening.

My dad is another x-factor in this equation.  Our relationship could best be described as "distant," and often described in much more severe terms.  He lives in Massachusetts, and is very excited to come down, watch the race, and take care of Fallon.  In fact, the only things we have really ever connected on have been me running marathons and Fallon.  Hopefully, this will be a positive, but it will definitely add a dynamic for which I am not sure I'm prepared.  He's not, and never has been the "cool dad" that my friends would be happy to have around.  Moast of the time, I rarely wanted him around.  I am just hoping the weekend is friendly, and he is well-groomed and congenial.  And that Fallon is nice to him.  (Actually now that I think about it, we'll have a lot of decades represented in this little entourage: Fallon (0-10), Elizabeth (20-30), Me (30-40), Bob (40-50), and Dad (60-70)...what an age range!)

Another logistical curve ball is our accommodations.  We are staying in an AirBNB. I've never used AirBNB before, and while I'm excited, I'm not quite sure what to expect.  The place looks cool--it's an art studio that's been converted into living space.  But, I am not sure it's in a safe part of the city I'm not that familiar with the city, but this was the closest place that could accommodate everyone.  I have my fingers crossed that it will be fine, but it adds an element of uncertainty one doesn't have when booking a hotel room or with a friend.

My ne'er-do-well friend Kevin, who is a dedicated and talented cyclist, told me not to worry, that I am "an athlete." I know that's true, and I believe him, but that doesn't mean that I'm feeling less "Peyton Manning," (an athlete in his prime, constantly bettering his abilities) and more "JaMarcus Russell" (the unstructured former Raiders quarterback, who relied on talent and did not hone his skills.)

I am hopeful it will all go well.  That everyone will get along, that the race--and the race-day weather--will be wonderful. If any one of the above concerns felt as if it was resolved or a non-worry, I think I could relax a little.  But right now, I am not full of confidence.  Fingers crossed...